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International Arbitration and Peace Association

An intergovernmental organization established to promote international co-operation between all nations regardless of tech level, species, or ideals. Financed by assessed and voluntary contributions from its member states, its objectives include maintaining international peace and security, promoting speciotarian rights, fostering social development, protecting the environment, and providing speciotarian aid in cases of famine, natural disaster, and armed conflict. It achieves these aims through dialog and action.

Premieres: 2017

Info: IAPA website

NOMINATION 3: Erde

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Swith
Founder

Posts: 320
NS Nation: Swith Witherward
Officer: OSF/IRC Admin Officer
Echelon: Public Affairs

NOMINATION 3: Erde Jan 19, 2016 15:05:25 GMT -4

Post by Swith on Jan 19, 2016 15:05:25 GMT -4

NOMINATION 3: Erde
Nominated by: Stormwrath
Notes by Stormwrath: "[writer's] post actually made me cry, and that may probably be the only post I have ever read in NS so far that made me shed tears. Even though the character was actually saying that just to fit the sad mood that was brought on, the things that she said made me think that she was genuine about her feelings."

ENTRY BEST HEARTWARMING OR TEAR-JERKER SINGLE POST

Erde saw the look in Adelaide's eyes as she stared at the bottle, and then saw the draining color which left her face. She could feel the sudden shift in her posture, saw the slight tremors in her hand and then watched her fall... To her own surprise she instinctively reached out with her hands and caught Adelaide gently or at least she hoped it was gentle.

But the reality was that the sudden shift in balance made her almost fall taking the weakened Adelaide with her. Out only a instant later she shifted her weight and held Adelaide carefully warping a arm below her armpit. Her ears were twitching as she listened whole heartedly to the received words however as her eyes looked gently at Adelaide's face and the tears that she knew were about the breach the surface soon.
She didn't realize when Adelaide had managed to shift the bottle back into her free hand but there it was, so for the moment she absently placed it away.

"I'm fine,"
"Bull, someone who almost collapse's is not fine! you idiot" erde thought in her mind, but she would never speak such words to Adelaide. However her next made Erde swallow hard as she nodded herself weakly in silent affirmation.
"Erde, you knew that I was once a thief, right? It was my fault that I was almost killed by the humans I stole from."

She looked even weaker and silently, it made Erde's little sadistic side lightly tingle...
"It was never their fault at all… I-I… I should've been the one regretting."

But such small personality twist was instantly blown away as the tear finally broke the surface and rolled gently down her cheek.
"If-if I hadn't stolen from them, I wouldn't have been nearly beaten to death that day."

Erde froze for a moment and then softened making a small sigh and speaking her eyes looking directly to Adelaide as she carefully readjusted and then carefully sat them both onto the ground. With her unfree arm she gently gripped further onto Adelaide and brought her closer while carefully shifting her own weight, then leaned in and kissed the tear away before gently holding Adelaide's chin and snuck one from her lips.
As she pulled back lightly then licking a portion of her lips with a mischievous smile, she quickly made a serious expression and then spoke.
"Stop that... Adelly... those days weren't your fault... you did what you had to survive. I know that you did it to save your friend.
Although that doesn't change the fact your method's were wrong... but your heart was in the right place...
You are strong Adelly... Far stronger then I could ever be...and that's what I love so much about you.
Your honesty, your strength, your ability to make a decision even when the cards are stacked, the way your heart is always caring for others...

Born into struggle but not blackened by it, you crawled your way out of the gutter to stand on your own two feet. It may not have been pretty but your experience carved you into who you were meant to be.
If you were to compare yourself to me... "

Erde stopped... she fell painfully silent and looked away uncomfortably, but for some reason she felt something flowing out. She couldn't understand it... but of course that was only natural after all how could she ever hear the screaming and suffering of her own heart... she would never notice the tears pouring out of her eyes from pain or the feelings of guilt that should take place after every kill, but she was devoid of so many emotions that the entire world seemed numb save for a select few individuals.

"I don't have any honesty, I lie and cheat, kill at my own leisure while taking pleasure in the suffering... A heart to give so easily to others, I don't think I have such a warmth within me anymore. I don't have the strength to trust my back to anyone...
And even though I was born into a loving family, I threw it all away after a single experience and became blinded by hatred for those who hurt me.
I allowed myself to be tainted until my morality was so warped that even if my own parents passed me they wouldn't recognize me anymore...

Your everything I know I can't be... "

And then Erde broke completely as tears suddenly overflowed, quickly instinctively she withdrew her arms away from Adelaide and then cradled her hand's onto her head... but she couldn't understand why, but quickly she started rocking while sobbing, as pain assaulted her, she quickly shut her eyes wanting to avoid the distorted scenery. but her voice kept going rambling words until the finally became incoherent with her painful sobbing.

"It's not fair... it's not fair... Why did this world have to do this to us... to so many like us... I didn't want to be a monster who only knows how to kill... but its all I can do now is tear out a person's throat... how do I go back... Back to that innocence... how do I live with the countless amounts of people I've killed Adelly..."

Last Edit: Feb 6, 2016 15:49:47 GMT -4 by Swith

´*•.¸´*•.¸♥¸.•*´¸.•*´
P2TM Mentor ❧ Mother of Threads
Fractal Hacker, Vent Fennec and Raptor Queen.

Swith Founder Posts: 320 NS Nation: Swith Witherward Officer: OSF/IRC Admin Officer Echelon: Public Affairs	NOMINATION 3: Erde Jan 19, 2016 15:21:47 GMT -4 Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Post by Swith on Jan 19, 2016 15:21:47 GMT -4 Judges: Esty, Lavan, NatSpi, Swith, Tilt, Tri
	Last Edit: Jan 20, 2016 1:59:17 GMT -4 by Swith ´•.¸´•.¸♥¸.•´¸.•´ P2TM Mentor ❧ Mother of Threads Fractal Hacker, Vent Fennec and Raptor Queen.

TDirect
Founder

Posts: 151

NS Nation: Transgravitas Directorate
Officer: IT Officer
Echelon: n/a

NOMINATION 3: Erde Jan 20, 2016 15:16:16 GMT -4

Post by TDirect on Jan 20, 2016 15:16:16 GMT -4

SPOILER: Click to show

BOX 1

	0	1	2	3	4	5	SCORE GIVEN
Creativity	The post/scene demonstrated no originality. Ideas are clearly derived from external sources	The post/scene demonstrates some original thought. Ideas are not obviously derived from external sources.			The post/scene demonstrates exceptional original thought. Ideas are not drawn from tired tropes; or if they are, they are presented in a creative fashion.	Beyond Excellence	1
Descriptive Language	There is extremely limited use of descriptive language, and/or the writer resorts to embedded links to character pictures rather than describing character appearances during the course of the post.	The post/scene demonstrates some use of prose to describe aspects of the post/scene. The writing allows the reader to visualize relevant aspects of the scene in their head.			The post/scene demonstrates exceptional use of prose to describe aspects of the post/scene. The writing allows the reader to clearly visualise the scene in their head.	Beyond Excellence	0
Good Diction	The writer applies an extremely limited vocabulary and/or all attempts at applying advanced vocabulary results in incorrect use of diction and confusion.	The writer makes some attempt at applying a variety of correctly applied diction.			The writer correctly applies a wide variety of precise language to augment the post/scene.	Beyond Excellence	0
Clear Presentment	There are no breaks in the text and/or breaks in the text are complete inconsistent and confusing.	Breaks in the text are occasionally used to break up ideas. Breaks are usually used in a way that correctly reflects writing convention.			Breaks in the text are used to effectively break up ideas. Breaks are used in a way that correctly reflects writing convention.	Beyond Excellence	0
Impact	The reader feels no emotional response to the post/scene	The reader feels some emotional response to the post/scene.			The reader is emotionally affected by the post/scene to an exceptional degree.	Beyond Excellence	0
Interest (does the post hold the judge's interest or do their eyes glaze over half way through?)	The reader quickly grows bored and feels the need to take breaks from reading the post/scene.	The reader rarely grows bored, and does not feel the need to take breaks from reading the post/scene.			The post/scene is compelling, and the reader never grows tired of reading.	Beyond Excellence	0
Spelling/Grammar/Mechanics	The post/scene is rife with orthographic, grammatical, and/or mechanical errors.	The post/scene has some orthographic, grammatical, and/or mechanical errors.			The writer has an exceptional command of English writing to conventions, and makes no orthographic, grammatical, or mechanical errors.	Beyond Excellence	0
Characterization	The character/s involved in the post/scene are flat, 2-Dimentional beings - wooden and not grounded in the scene. (For scenes: The character fails to react to other characters in the post/scene.) The reader has no reason to emotionally invest in the character.	The characters are somewhat fleshed out and believable. The reader can see some thought process occurring inside the character's head/s. The writer often uses dialog as well as action to denote emotion.			Characters are fully fleshed out and the reader can empathize with them. Dialog and action flow seamlessly to create a rounded picture in the reader's mind. The character is portrayed exceptionally and stays in character throughout post/scene.	Beyond Excellence	0
TOTAL			---	---			1

BOX 2

	0	1	2	3	4	5	Total
Show, don't tell	Flawless	Post/Scene has excellent balance between exposition and narrative.				Scene/Post is primarily exposition. (Note: this does not count if a post is meant to be an exposition - meaning the post is crucial to set up the narrative arc.) Reader becomes annoyed and skims the post.	2
Verbosity	Flawless	Writing is nearly tight, superfluous details are not overly present.		Writing is loose and could have used an edit or three. Superfluous details are present and/or sometimes clutter the scene/post.		Post/s is too verbose (writer rambles, writing isn't tight, writing is overly complicated and cumbersome). Too much attention paid to unnecessary details. Reader becomes annoyed and skims the scene/post.	2
Dialog	Flawless	Dialog is tightly written, does not ramble, and the speaker is defined, but there are some formatting issues.		Dialog is somewhat defined by speaker but there is abundant use of "he said/she said".		Dialog is not defined by speaker or action/Dialog reads like a script. Reader must backtrack to recall who is speaking. Reader becomes annoyed and skims the scene/post.	5
Dialog formatting	Flawless	Speaker's dialog is properly defined but there are still some formatting errors.		Speaker's dialog is denoted by a simple "Sam said" throughout the post. General lack of creativity when formatting. Improper punctuation (example: "Yes." He said.)		Speaker's dialog is denoted by colored fonts or formatting. (Note: telepathic dialog is often italicized and thus poor marks will not be given.)	5
Action	Flawless	Action is present and contains few repetitive motions. Action flows, though not flawlessly.		Action is present but repetitive, or does not flow with the rest of the scene, or it feels tacked on for the sake of defining dialog.		Action is denoted by asterisks, or action is not present at all in the post.	3
For Collaborations	Flawless	It is nearly impossible to tell where one writer leaves off and another begins.		Writers' styles somewhat match, but the reader can still determine who is writing what.		Readers can clearly see where one writer leaves off and another begins. The different writing styles are obvious and cobbled together poorly. The contrast between the stronger and weaker writers is glaring.	N/A
TOTAL			---		---		17

SCORE

Scores are calculated by subtracting Box 2 from Box 1. Example:

Box 1: 18

Box 2: 8

Final Score: 10

TOTAL FROM BOX 1	1
TOTAL FROM BOX 2	17
FINAL SCORE	-16

Swith
Founder

Posts: 320
NS Nation: Swith Witherward
Officer: OSF/IRC Admin Officer
Echelon: Public Affairs

NOMINATION 3: Erde Jan 20, 2016 17:46:00 GMT -4

Post by Swith on Jan 20, 2016 17:46:00 GMT -4

SPOILER: Click to show

BOX 1

	0	1	2	3	4	5	SCORE GIVEN
Creativity	0 The post/scene demonstrated no originality. Ideas are clearly derived from external sources	1 The post/scene demonstrates some original thought. Ideas are not obviously derived from external sources.	2	3	4 The post/scene demonstrates exceptional original thought. Ideas are not drawn from tired tropes; or if they are, they are presented in a creative fashion.	5 Beyond Excellence	2
Descriptive Language	0 There is extremely limited use of descriptive language, and/or the writer resorts to embedded links to character pictures rather than describing character appearances during the course of the post.	1 The post/scene demonstrates some use of prose to describe aspects of the post/scene. The writing allows the reader to visualize relevant aspects of the scene in their head.	2	3	4 The post/scene demonstrates exceptional use of prose to describe aspects of the post/scene. The writing allows the reader to clearly visualise the scene in their head.	5 Beyond Excellence	1
Good Diction	0 The writer applies an extremely limited vocabulary and/or all attempts at applying advanced vocabulary results in incorrect use of diction and confusion.	1 The writer makes some attempt at applying a variety of correctly applied diction.	2	3	4 The writer correctly applies a wide variety of precise language to augment the post/scene.	5 Beyond Excellence	0
Clear Presentment	0 There are no breaks in the text and/or breaks in the text are complete inconsistent and confusing.	1 Breaks in the text are occasionally used to break up ideas. Breaks are usually used in a way that correctly reflects writing convention.	2	3	4 Breaks in the text are used to effectively break up ideas. Breaks are used in a way that correctly reflects writing convention.	5 Beyond Excellence	0
Impact	0 The reader feels no emotional response to the post/scene	1 The reader feels some emotional response to the post/scene.	2	3	4 The reader is emotionally affected by the post/scene to an exceptional degree.	5 Beyond Excellence	1
Interest (does the post hold the judge's interest or do their eyes glaze over half way through?)	0 The reader quickly grows bored and feels the need to take breaks from reading the post/scene.	1 The reader rarely grows bored, and does not feel the need to take breaks from reading the post/scene.	2	3	4 The post/scene is compelling, and the reader never grows tired of reading.	5 Beyond Excellence	1
Spelling/Grammar/Mechanics	0 The post/scene is rife with orthographic, grammatical, and/or mechanical errors.	1 The post/scene has some orthographic, grammatical, and/or mechanical errors.	2	3	4 The writer has an exceptional command of English writing to conventions, and makes no orthographic, grammatical, or mechanical errors.	5 Beyond Excellence	0
Characterization	0 The character/s involved in the post/scene are flat, 2-Dimentional beings - wooden and not grounded in the scene. (For scenes: The character fails to react to other characters in the post/scene.) The reader has no reason to emotionally invest in the character.	1 The characters are somewhat fleshed out and believable. The reader can see some thought process occurring inside the character's head/s. The writer often uses dialog as well as action to denote emotion.	2	3	4 Characters are fully fleshed out and the reader can empathize with them. Dialog and action flow seamlessly to create a rounded picture in the reader's mind. The character is portrayed exceptionally and stays in character throughout post/scene.	5 Beyond Excellence	1
TOTAL			---	---			6

BOX 2

	0	1	2	3	4	5	Total
Show, don't tell	0 Flawless	1 Post/Scene has excellent balance between exposition and narrative.	2	3	4	5 Scene/Post is primarily exposition. (Note: this does not count if a post is meant to be an exposition - meaning the post is crucial to set up the narrative arc.) Reader becomes annoyed and skims the post.	2
Verbosity	0 Flawless	1 Writing is nearly tight, superfluous details are not overly present.	2	3 Writing is loose and could have used an edit or three. Superfluous details are present and/or sometimes clutter the scene/post.	4	5 Post/s is too verbose (writer rambles, writing isn't tight, writing is overly complicated and cumbersome). Too much attention paid to unnecessary details. Reader becomes annoyed and skims the scene/post.	3
Dialog	0 Flawless	1 Dialog is tightly written, does not ramble, and the speaker is defined, but there are some formatting issues.	2	3 Dialog is somewhat defined by speaker but there is abundant use of "he said/she said".	4	5 Dialog is not defined by speaker or action/Dialog reads like a script. Reader must backtrack to recall who is speaking. Reader becomes annoyed and skims the scene/post.	3
Dialog formatting	0 Flawless	1 Speaker's dialog is properly defined but there are still some formatting errors.	2	3 Speaker's dialog is denoted by a simple "Sam said" throughout the post. General lack of creativity  when formatting. Improper punctuation (example: "Yes." He said.)	4	5 Speaker's dialog is denoted by colored fonts or formatting. (Note: telepathic dialog is often italicized and thus poor marks will not be given.)	5
Action	0 Flawless	1 Action is present and contains few repetitive motions. Action flows, though not flawlessly.	2	3 Action is present but repetitive, or does not flow with the rest of the scene, or it feels tacked on for the sake of defining dialog.	4	5 Action is denoted by asterisks, or action is not present at all in the post.	3
For Collaborations	0 Flawless	1 It is nearly impossible to tell where one writer leaves off and another begins.	2	3 Writers' styles somewhat match, but the reader can still determine who is writing what.	4	5 Readers can clearly see where one writer leaves off and another begins. The different writing styles are obvious and cobbled together poorly. The contrast between the stronger and weaker writers is glaring.	NA
TOTAL			---		---		-16

SCORE
Scores are calculated by subtracting Box 2 from Box 1. Example:
Box 1: 18
Box 2: 8
Final Score: 10

TOTAL FROM BOX 1	6
TOTAL FROM BOX 2	16
FINAL SCORE	-10

Last Edit: Jan 20, 2016 17:47:44 GMT -4 by Swith

´*•.¸´*•.¸♥¸.•*´¸.•*´
P2TM Mentor ❧ Mother of Threads
Fractal Hacker, Vent Fennec and Raptor Queen.

Cer
Founder

"Cobra tacos!"

Posts: 173

NS Nation: Cerillium
Officer: Public Affairs Officer
Echelon: OSF Admin Assistant

NOMINATION 3: Erde Feb 5, 2016 15:23:52 GMT -4

Post by Cer on Feb 5, 2016 15:23:52 GMT -4

SPOILER: Click to show

BOX 1

	0	1	2	3	4	5	SCORE GIVEN
Creativity	0 The post/scene demonstrated no originality. Ideas are clearly derived from external sources	1 The post/scene demonstrates some original thought. Ideas are not obviously derived from external sources.	2	3	4 The post/scene demonstrates exceptional original thought. Ideas are not drawn from tired tropes; or if they are, they are presented in a creative fashion.	5 Beyond Excellence	1
Descriptive Language	0 There is extremely limited use of descriptive language, and/or the writer resorts to embedded links to character pictures rather than describing character appearances during the course of the post.	1 The post/scene demonstrates some use of prose to describe aspects of the post/scene. The writing allows the reader to visualize relevant aspects of the scene in their head.	2	3	4 The post/scene demonstrates exceptional use of prose to describe aspects of the post/scene. The writing allows the reader to clearly visualise the scene in their head.	5 Beyond Excellence	1
Good Diction	0 The writer applies an extremely limited vocabulary and/or all attempts at applying advanced vocabulary results in incorrect use of diction and confusion.	1 The writer makes some attempt at applying a variety of correctly applied diction.	2	3	4 The writer correctly applies a wide variety of precise language to augment the post/scene.	5 Beyond Excellence	0
Clear Presentment	0 There are no breaks in the text and/or breaks in the text are complete inconsistent and confusing.	1 Breaks in the text are occasionally used to break up ideas. Breaks are usually used in a way that correctly reflects writing convention.	2	3	4 Breaks in the text are used to effectively break up ideas. Breaks are used in a way that correctly reflects writing convention.	5 Beyond Excellence	0
Impact	0 The reader feels no emotional response to the post/scene	1 The reader feels some emotional response to the post/scene.	2	3	4 The reader is emotionally affected by the post/scene to an exceptional degree.	5 Beyond Excellence	1
Interest (does the post hold the judge's interest or do their eyes glaze over half way through?)	0 The reader quickly grows bored and feels the need to take breaks from reading the post/scene.	1 The reader rarely grows bored, and does not feel the need to take breaks from reading the post/scene.	2	3	4 The post/scene is compelling, and the reader never grows tired of reading.	5 Beyond Excellence	1
Spelling/Grammar/Mechanics	0 The post/scene is rife with orthographic, grammatical, and/or mechanical errors.	1 The post/scene has some orthographic, grammatical, and/or mechanical errors.	2	3	4 The writer has an exceptional command of English writing to conventions, and makes no orthographic, grammatical, or mechanical errors.	5 Beyond Excellence	0
Characterization	0 The character/s involved in the post/scene are flat, 2-Dimentional beings - wooden and not grounded in the scene. (For scenes: The character fails to react to other characters in the post/scene.) The reader has no reason to emotionally invest in the character.	1 The characters are somewhat fleshed out and believable. The reader can see some thought process occurring inside the character's head/s. The writer often uses dialog as well as action to denote emotion.	2	3	4 Characters are fully fleshed out and the reader can empathize with them. Dialog and action flow seamlessly to create a rounded picture in the reader's mind. The character is portrayed exceptionally and stays in character throughout post/scene.	5 Beyond Excellence	1
TOTAL			---	---			5

BOX 2

	0	1	2	3	4	5	Total
Show, don't tell	0 Flawless	1 Post/Scene has excellent balance between exposition and narrative.	2	3	4	5 Scene/Post is primarily exposition. (Note: this does not count if a post is meant to be an exposition - meaning the post is crucial to set up the narrative arc.) Reader becomes annoyed and skims the post.	4
Verbosity	0 Flawless	1 Writing is nearly tight, superfluous details are not overly present.	2	3 Writing is loose and could have used an edit or three. Superfluous details are present and/or sometimes clutter the scene/post.	4	5 Post/s is too verbose (writer rambles, writing isn't tight, writing is overly complicated and cumbersome). Too much attention paid to unnecessary details. Reader becomes annoyed and skims the scene/post.	4
Dialog	0 Flawless	1 Dialog is tightly written, does not ramble, and the speaker is defined, but there are some formatting issues.	2	3 Dialog is somewhat defined by speaker but there is abundant use of "he said/she said".	4	5 Dialog is not defined by speaker or action/Dialog reads like a script. Reader must backtrack to recall who is speaking. Reader becomes annoyed and skims the scene/post.	3
Dialog formatting	0 Flawless	1 Speaker's dialog is properly defined but there are still some formatting errors.	2	3 Speaker's dialog is denoted by a simple "Sam said" throughout the post. General lack of creativity when formatting. Improper punctuation (example: "Yes." He said.)	4	5 Speaker's dialog is denoted by colored fonts or formatting. (Note: telepathic dialog is often italicized and thus poor marks will not be given.)	5
Action	0 Flawless	1 Action is present and contains few repetitive motions. Action flows, though not flawlessly.	2	3 Action is present but repetitive, or does not flow with the rest of the scene, or it feels tacked on for the sake of defining dialog.	4	5 Action is denoted by asterisks, or action is not present at all in the post.	2
For Collaborations	0 Flawless	1 It is nearly impossible to tell where one writer leaves off and another begins.	2	3 Writers' styles somewhat match, but the reader can still determine who is writing what.	4	5 Readers can clearly see where one writer leaves off and another begins. The different writing styles are obvious and cobbled together poorly. The contrast between the stronger and weaker writers is glaring.	NA
TOTAL			---		---		18

SCORE
Scores are calculated by subtracting Box 2 from Box 1. Example:
Box 1: 18
Box 2: 8
Final Score: 10

TOTAL FROM BOX 1	5
TOTAL FROM BOX 2	18
FINAL SCORE	-13

How Not To Give A Shit: Fearless Lessons From... The Honey Badger

Swith Founder Posts: 320 NS Nation: Swith Witherward Officer: OSF/IRC Admin Officer Echelon: Public Affairs	NOMINATION 3: Erde Feb 6, 2016 15:49:50 GMT -4 Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Post by Swith on Feb 6, 2016 15:49:50 GMT -4 SCORING COMPLETED
	´•.¸´•.¸♥¸.•´¸.•´ P2TM Mentor ❧ Mother of Threads Fractal Hacker, Vent Fennec and Raptor Queen.

title

NOMINATION 3: Erde

Post by Swith on Jan 19, 2016 15:05:25 GMT -4

Post by Swith on Jan 19, 2016 15:21:47 GMT -4

Post by TDirect on Jan 20, 2016 15:16:16 GMT -4

Post by Swith on Jan 20, 2016 17:46:00 GMT -4

Post by Cer on Feb 5, 2016 15:23:52 GMT -4

Post by Swith on Feb 6, 2016 15:49:50 GMT -4